Yes I know the title of this post sounds a tad bit surprising but for me the year 2015-2016 has been a the biggest folly I ever committed concerning my health. And it happened in full consciousness but it was still out of my hands. And I hate myself right now and proof is always more dramatic in pictures, which I don’t click anymore.

There have been a lot of things going on in my mind as 2016 is about to end, but going to the dentist the other day was an eye opener because standing on the weighing scales and him analyzing the condition of my teeth as a direct result of Hypothyroidism and Vitamin D deficiency. It was very sad for me to accept that even my teeth can be affected by weight gain.

And no it doesn’t end there.

As of now, my weight is responsible for my Hypothyroidism, Insulin Resistance, Plantar Fasciitis and Heel pain, PCOS (Polycystic Ovary Syndrome), constipation, muscle cramps and a slow metabolic system.
And every doctor I have ever visited came down to one cause : STRESS and DEPRESSION !

I am a 5’4 average built Indian girl. All my life i.e the last 25 years, I have been pretty much healthy, participating in athletic events in school etc
After I began college, my weight started fluctuating a few kgs up and down of 55 and that’s how it stayed for almost 3-4 years.
Last year after I finished college things got complicated between my parents and me, I developed a habit of stressing constantly without even realizing that I was doing it. And then in February 2016, things went very very bad.
Since then I have gained almost 20 kgs until now.I didn’t try to, I was eating my regular stuff. It happened so quietly that while writing this right now I realize I only menstruated 5 times in 2016, which is indeed a very f***ed up situation for my body.
Ah, maybe actually not that quietly. I have moved clothing sizes from S and M to L and XL right now. So nothing in my wardrobe that belonged to the old me fits anymore at all.

The worst part is everything that my body is going through right now is interconnected but only when I manage to lose weight will things fall in line. My gynae has told me that as per my BMI I am officially obese now. And this is even more depressing for me.

Honestly I do support body positivism no matter what one’s size is but if being fat comes at the price I am paying now, its traumatic I think. Because every morning when I get out of bed, it takes at least 10 minutes for my back ache to become bearable so I can get up and another 5 minutes of massaging feet so I can keep them on the ground or else I feel pin pricks in my feet.
Maybe its just my health issues that makes this worse, or it’s the same for everyone I really don’t know. Any advice/suggestions are welcome.

And I’m not even a voracious eater 😦
I love drinking water through the day and I am fond of home cooked meals. My junk intake is also like once in 2 weeks or something with the Dominos Burger King types of food. My only weakness is desserts which I try to curb as much as possible still end up eating twice a week.

It has been a terrible reality check and I know only I can begin and no one else will do it for me. Things with my parents have still not settled down, I hope I can resolve them and not take stress about it in my head all the time.

So yes, I am making an early resolution starting from today and not waiting for January 01,2017. It’s necessary because I am scared for my body.

p.s. I hope to share pictures soon when I feel confident enough to show them to the world.

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